I'm Not Slowing Down on My Writing, Though
November 30^th, 2003
11:21 P. M.

First off, let me say that I've been trying to keep my private life off this blog. I think I've been successful in that for the most part. Like anyone out there, there are things about my life that I just don't want to share with anyone but my closest friends. And, even then, there are things I would prefer to keep to myself.
That is, until I get them sorted out.

I don't really do anything all that scandalous ... I don't have any hard drug habits ... No random, anonymous partners ... or anything that would be all that interesting. (So, there go my dreams of being a noted public figure!)
Heck, I haven't been on a date for about eight months now (if you were to count a "real date" as being out with a significant other, then it has been well over a year).

So, the majority of the writing I've been doing has been intensely private, but the gist of it has been trying to figure out where my love life has gone wrong ... and learning what I did to miss out on past opportunities in order not to miss out on the next.

It's come down to this;

SPEAK UP WHEN YOU LIKE SOMEONE!
and
Don't be afraid to leave the one who's not treating you right for one you know would treat you right.
Don't be afraid of making a fool of yourself. Better to be thought a fool and have someone special in your life than to be a suspected fool and have no-one.

Easy lessons to pass on to other people, but let's see if I can actually put them to use.

*** ** *** ** *** **

I know he doesn't read this, because his computer doesn't always work right, but today was Dad's birthday. He turned Fifty today, and the phrase "Happy Birthday" never left my lips tonight. I'm so ashamed of that ... but I did sing the "Happy Birthday Song" with the waiters and waitresses at the Cracker Barrel we went to tonight (to which I showed up an hour late ... what a dutiful son I turned out to be.)

I had no birthday present for him ... but I already have his Christmas present here ... the thing is, I am fairly sure he already has what I got for him. But, I think it's in a different key ... there's your clue, Dad, if you ever get to read my drivel.

I Must Be Slowing Down On This Blog Thing!
November 26^th, 2003
12:30 A. M.

Yes, friends and neighbors, associates and curious onlookers, I think I'm slipping! I haven't exactly run out of things to write about, but I do think I've fallen into a mood where I don't feel like writing as often.
I must admit one thing ... this may not be much of a revelation here, but I've been feeling a little down lately. I trace it back to only the time change, and the shortening of the days, so it could only be seasonal. I haven't paid particular attention to the way my moods change with the seasons in the past, but here in these past few weeks, I've been feeling a little more down than usual.

And coming home to an empty house doesn't help, either.

I really need someone with whom I could share my space.

* ** * *** * ** * ***

Humpday Quote of the

Week!
I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity.
-- Albert Einstein

My, do I have a lot of maturing to do!

I Don't Date Co-Workers
November 24^th, 2003
11:46 P. M.

Yes, that was the answer today. I was disappointed in that answer.

Not so much that it was a "no", but that it was too soft of a "no".
I'm much more accustomed to being told I'm not the kind of guy they're looking for.
And, when I say that, I mean it's "Get away from me, you geek."

...I feel like I've lost my touch...

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!!!!
November 24^th, 2003
12:34 A. M.

Ok, though it is no longer Sunday, I will write about it.
Nothing special happened today. However, it has been a counter-productive week, as usual, for me. I have done absolutely nothing to advance myself toward a future. I do nothing more than allow time to sweep me forward.

Nothing more at all.

Time for some honesty here, while I still have a little bit of an alcohol buzz left. I don't get these very often, and I figure that it will be as interesting for me to read what I have written as it will be for you.

Not that I have had enough to have forgotten anything that has happened tonight (as usual, nothing worth reporting...I openly admit that I have no chance with any woman whether I think she is attractive or not. So whether I'm buzzed or not, I won't come on to a woman.)

So, more honesty. I have to ask myself, "Do I really want to have a relationship at all?"

The answer to that alternates between the only two possible answers there are. The is "yes" or "no." Nothing in between. No conditions, no qualifiers, no rationalizations.

So, if I could settle on an answer, I think I would be a lot more satisfied with my life.
I feel like my chances at a viable relationships dissipated years ago. Honestly, I can tell you that this scenario does not bother me. At all.
If I had my chance and blew it, that's all there is to it. No use complaining or crying myself to sleep over it (which I did a night or two ago.)

So, at this point, I figure, tomorrow I'll just ask this new lady out. If she says "yes," I'll take her out and be myself.
If I can trust what D says (and I know I can), then I have nothing to worry about. The new lady will like me the way I already like her. She'll give me a chance.

And, if it all falls through, there is always the possibility I posted about on Wednesday.

I wonder what the climate is like in Hades these days?

Happy Birthday, D!
November 20^th, 2003
12:56 A. M.

Happy birthday to one of my dearest friends I have. All right, the dearest friend I have.

A year ago today;
I had lost (for the second time) my best friend a week ago.
I had one of the last contacts with my ex-girlfriend (who for some reason was not willing to reconcile.)
I felt very alone and...well...bored.

I didn't know where my life was headed. I felt like I had no friends (at least all the ones I had since childhood had undergone some sort of radical transformation, and they were no longer the people I knew them to be.) And, it was several months until I would reconnect with someone...someone I had forgotten exactly how much she had meant to me.

...And I never got to tell her before.

Today is her birthday. She is 29 years old (if she doesn't mind me pointing that out) and has been through quite a bit.

I'm hoping her life levels out from now on, and every wish she has ever had comes true.

...And, I'm hoping she forgives me for not having bought a birthday present for her...

I Think I’m Finally Ready to Date Again
November 20^th, 2003
12:40 A. M.

Yes, folks, I do believe I am ready to start dating again…maybe.
There is a new woman at work. Well, she’s relatively new…been with us for about two months

I’ve already checked her out thoroughly. No rings, engagement or otherwise. (To what did you think I was alluding?) The only other woman I’ve met so far who could have changed my mind about dating again has a wedding ring…ah, well. Just means I had to wait a few more months to meet this new lady.

There isn’t much I can tell about her here. Yesterday was the first time we ever talked to each other. She seemed happy to tell me about her work history, how she enjoys her new job, and where she grew up. And, the conversation came pretty easily between us.

I may have been prepared to move too quickly, but I was going to ask her out today. Unfortunately, we’re going through one of the busiest weeks of the year at work; I had no opportunity to talk to her today, other than to say “hello.”

It figures…I’m no longer shy, I’m now feeling like time is right for me to ask someone out (and it looks like a good possibility this time), and it looks like “volume of business” could force the opportunity to pass.

I suppose, though, that all it would mean is I would have to wait a couple more months to meet someone new…

Or…

…Perhaps on the day Hades hosts the Winter Olympics, I could meet Jennifer Love Hewitt or Linda Cardellini and still be available

However, if there is anything right in this world, these two ladies will not be available if I ever get to meet them.

* ** * *** * ** * ***

With that aside, it's time for the ...

Humpday Quote of the

Week!

It is ever the invisible that is the object of our profoundest worship. With the lover it is not the seen but the unseen that he muses upon.

Christian Nestell Bovee

And Now for Your Feature Presentation!
November 12^th, 2003
10:09 P.M.

Interesting news, everyone! I have been job hunting on my 3 days off. My bosses told me to think about the importance of my job while I was away, and I have.
I remember what one of them told me shortly after I started this job;
"Some people just aren't cut out to work 'in this department'."

Of course, that is an edited version of what I was told. I still remember it word for word, and if I were to repeat it here, I am afraid I would reveal too much about where I work.
But, that phrase has been running around my head for the past three days. I do believe that I was earmarked for failure; no matter what I did from that point on, I would never be able to get ahead where I am working now.

So, today (while in a particularly obstinate mood) I applied for a job that required a high school diploma and two years of experience in the type of field I am working in now. Here's where the obstinate part comes in...get this! The starting pay for the job(s) I am applying for is greater than the pay the supervisor who told me "some people are not cut out" is getting, and she has been at this organization for a while now.
So, yes I agree that some people are not cut out to work where I'm working. I actually am cut out to work where I'm working right now, but if you don't think so, fine.
I'll go work for the local university making pretty close to what you're making, and I'll be getting my degree.
...From there I will definitely be better of than you.

I'm not cut out for this job. I'm cut out for better.

Humpday Quote of the

Week!

Forgive your enemies. But don't forget their names.
-----Tin Sign seen in local restaurant in Lexington, Kentucky

My First Handwritten Entry!
November 11^th, 2003
6:01 P. M.

Yes, indeed! My first handwritten entry. And it feels strange not being able to hit my backspace key to fix grammatical errors and spelling mistakes.
I like being able to correct my mistakes and leave what I've written legible. It's impossible to show here, but I do make a great many mistakes which can make reading my handwriting a chore (even for me).

Well, I've been thinking about writing about my workplace and my experiences there.
However, I am on the second day of a three day suspension on what I believe to be some trumped up charges.
So much for that. Pity. I would really love to reveal the name of the place I work for, and possibly aid in its business. Until everything blows over, all things are settled, I will not say where I work.
I will also not write about some of the things I (and quite a few too many other people in other departments) have been going through.
Let me day that I work for a place that provides very vital services, that I would recommend people to help out in any way. No matter what I am going through there, this place is something I consider to be indispensable to our society.
Suffice it to say, I work at a charitable organization, and I will take this opportunity to encourage everyone to do anything they can for any charity they so choose.
It will be worthwhile for everyone involved.

Finding My Muse
November 10 ^th, 2003
9:09 P. M.
Yesterday, I wrote about my family's early Thanksgiving. Well, a whole lot happened there last night, particularly between my dad and I.

Dad had been many things in his life; Carpenter in his dad's independent contracting business, a contractor himself, a college student, a High School science teacher, and now a manager/part owner of a hardware store.

Through all these occupations, he has kept one thing on the side...he also happens to be a pretty good guitarist. Bass, lead, rhythm...acoustic or electric.

One of the things that I've always wondered about is why he didn't pursue his music as a career. Had he taken it up before I was born...or even after I was born, he might have made it somewhere.

Now, I have to say that I have no idea what kind of life a rock musician would lead. I have heard many different stories about many different people doing pretty much the same thing with their success...
....And that would be self destructing!

It almost doesn't matter what kind of personality these stars have. I've heard of stars who are relatively mild mannered (when compared with some of their contemporaries) overdosing on some strange chemical.
I've heard about wild parties...groupies...all sorts of things.

When you go back into these people's lives, you will see that they started out as normal children. Most of them came from families with "traditional values." The only difference between people who would become stars and those who don't is simply this...they show some remarkable talent at an early age.

As did my dad. He showed pretty early that he could pick up on a musical instrument very rapidly. He grew up around musicians (as did I, but I never showed the talent), had a lot of exposure, and actually spent time in his youth (between the ages of 8 and 13) practicing guitar on his own.
In Junior High, he was in a band (he told me the name, but I've forgotten it) that practiced in a friend's garage on Saturdays. From there, he continued on...in High School, he and some friends of his formed a band they called "The Naked Grape."

These guys actually had a few real gigs around town in the late sixties and early seventies. They were well known enough to have had a 15 year reunion in 1981 that a whole lot of people showed up! I got to hear them practicing for a couple of months leading up to the show. I remember these guys sounding real good!

How many 8 year old kids could say that their dad was in an early 70s garage/punk band?

But, looking back on that concert, I can tell you now that if any of the artists they covered that night had heard it, the Naked Grape probably would have been offered a recording contract on the spot.

For some reason, though, these guys would have passed on it. I know they would have.

I don't really know why, though. Seems like a nice, healthy racket, if you ask me.

Like the song "Money for Nothing" says;
That ain't workin'
That's the way you do it.

I suppose, though, that signing a contract while you have a wife and children (and yes, all the members of the band were married and had children) would be hard to do.

I do understand some of the financial ramifications of the recording industry. Those being that these contracts heavily favor record labels and that the artists are usually the last in line for payday.
Most of the money an artist would make (as I understand things), they would make on a tour. And tours can be incredibly expensive...most new acts will barely break even on their first tour. Some have even been known to be broken by a first tour.

So, after reviewing my own words here, I can understand my dad's reluctance to join that crowd!

But...I'm faced with an interesting idea....

I have no wife or children to think about. I, alas, am not musically inclined, but I have been an actor before!

I will try again. Coming up this Saturday, a local stage company is holding an audition. I intend to be there. I'm going in with the same attitude I had in High School. If I make it, great, but if I don't, at least I tried. (There will be more auditions, anyway. I'm not giving up so easily.)

And, if through this blog I rediscover the secret to good writing, I'll try my hand at that too.
All I have to do (like Dad told me last night) is to find my muse!

Thanksgiving Came Early this Year
November 9^th, 2003
11:32 P. M.

That's right! My family had its thanksgiving dinner tonight. Not all that odd when you consider that a member of my family is stationed overseas.
Now, I know what you're thinking, and no, it it isn't Iraq.
We did get together tonight, however, and it was strange.

Let me tell you how.

It's either because I'm getting older, or;

What I thought was "getting older" isn't all that old after all.
I was there listening to my dad and his two younger brothers, and watching them too. I mean, really observing them. Even the youngest (if he'll forgive me) is showing signs of that dread "middle-age spread".
(I am, too, but I've been a little chunky for quite a while now. Not only that...I am nowhere near midlife!) I'm only 12 years younger than Dad's youngest brother, so I don't know if he's really middle aged or not.
When you consider it, though, who knows when midlife really is?

Furthermore, who cares? My dad and his two brothers don't seem to be bothered by getting older. (Dad, in fact, turns 50 this month.)

Chances are, that in about 20 years, I won't care about getting older either. I may forget writing this tonight and flip out a few more times as the years go by (thinking to myself "I should have done this, that, and the other by now!), but that's hard to stop.
No matter how aware, but nonchalant you are about your own aging, you'll still feel the temptation to compare your life to someone else's. Then you will find the spots in your life that don't measure up to the others'.

Why do we do that?

I know I will do it. Time and again, and again I will do that.
I've done it already.
I've said before;

I want to be married by 25
I want to have a child on the way by 30

Hasn't happened that way, though!

I, standing at the threshold of thirty, have not only never been married, I have no girlfriend. I have no children. None expected, either! Hard to expect a child when you haven't met the mother yet.

I know I could probably adopt; I've heard that one too many times (in fact, I think I've heard that only once).

Just a weakness of mine. I want to have a family as close to the traditional way as possible.

If I wind up with someone who cannot have children, for whatever reason, I would only then adopt.

I would be a single parent if the choice were thrust upon me.
And I don't want to think about that...
I've already lost...too often.

So, then, some of you are asking yourselves this;
"It sounds like this guy is feeling down about his life. Since his family gathered for Thanksgiving so early, then why isn't he writing about what he's thankful for?"
Well, I'm glad you asked. I was just getting around to that.
To meet me in person, you might have to study me carefully to know that I feel down about anything. Those closest to me know, but even to them it doesn't come out as strong as it could.

But, since the question of my thankfulness has been raised, I'll tell you...

I feel thankful for the opportunities that lie ahead of me.
I'm thankful that I haven't gotten my wishes when I wanted them granted. If I had, I now wonder...would I have appreciated them as much then as I will when they are finally granted?
And, finally;
I'm thankful that I'm getting (hopefully) a little wiser. If it is true that I am learning from my past mistakes, then maybe...just maybe...I am one step closer to attaining my dreams.

That's all for tonight.
I hope you all find something in your lives to be thankful for. If it's only the fact that people get sappy and sentimental like this only once a year.

I Haven't Done One of These in a While
November 7^th, 2003
10:00 A. M.

It's Friday, and I'm about to answer five questions on a topic I hope is interesting.

1. What food do you like that most people hate?
It might be a little easier to answer this one if there were only one example.
But, every time that I've mentioned liking blood pudding, someone has acted like it's the most terrible thing that they've heard.
I've written about this before. I have a sneaking suspicion that if you were to ask these people how they like their steaks or hamburgers, they'd say "Rare." I don't understand that....

2. What food do you hate that most people love?
That question really isn't much easier. I can't say that I hate much.
Let's just say that my tastes have matured very little since the days I used to gag on "chicken a la king." That stuff was terrible when I was a kid. It's been nearly 25 years since I had it last, and I have no intention of ever having it again.

3. What famous person, whom many people may find attractive, is most unappealing to you?
Well...I have this thing about not mentioning this person's name. It is a woman...I have found her totally unappealing since I first heard of her in the early 80's.
The day that I realized that she was still recording and Cyndi Lauper had dropped off the face of the Earth (which she has thankfully returned), I knew my lucky star had stopped shining. And, I no longer felt that this world was anything...mmm...like a virgin.
I just don't want to help this person sell any more records than she already has.
The day I went to church with D, the preacher mentioned this person by name. It disappointed me because not only do I never want to hear that name again, the preacher might have inadvertently helped to sell a few more albums.
So, if you know who I'm talking about...buy her albums if you truly like them. However, I would suggest Cyndi Lauper over her. And, of course, Aimee Mann.

4. What famous person, whom many people may find unappealing, do you find
attractive?
Hard to say. Most of the famous people that folks think are attractive, I would agree with. Same thing with the unappealing ones...
I could have shortened this answer to a simple "I don't know," but I didn't.
Why?
I don't know.

5. What popular trend baffles you?
You're asking for only one?
Well, I must say that angry white men baffle me. Especially the ones with radio talk shows. These guys have made it. Some of them have even made it big. And, to get where they have gotten, you need to care about no-one but yourself. Look out for Number One, these fellows would tell you.
Then, they get behind the microphone and raise their voices, shout, and make all sorts of angry noises about some injustice being done to them or their kind.
Well, fellows, I am one of your kind. And, there isn't a whole lot going on, as far as national policies, that can anger me.
Equal rights? Come on. Women have earned them. Black folks in this country have been oppressed long enough. They're people too. (If anything, some women have proven themselves to be a little more cold blooded than us. Therefore, some of them would make great "corporate raiders.")
Equal opportunity? Again, come on! Hasn't time proven, again and again, that if left to their own devices, that people who do the hiring would only hire (and promote) folks that are part of the same demographic as they themselves are? White men? Oh, come on!
We aren't superior! We're just people, and so is everyone else!

Well....I do have a penchant for ranting after all.

Jumping the Gun A Little, Here
November 6^th, 2003
11:58 P. M.

I know, I know. I'm about 10 minutes early with this post. Had I waited, I would have a Friday post, but I didn't feel like it.

I'm too excited to wait. I just noticed that D has posted to my comments!
Well, D, thank you for the compliment, there...and blog here as often as you like!
That's right, folks! The wonderful lady who brings us Open Escape will be blogging as often as she can through my comments.
It appears that the computer issues she was having at home a few months back have returned. This time around, with a full class load (papers to write, books to read...that whole mess), she has no time left to fix her computer's problem with staying connected to the internet.
By the way, D, you don't have to use your full first name if you don't want to. I haven't used mine since the "Cyborger" post a couple of months ago. I'm betting that everyone except for you and Tim at work (my possible running mate in the 2007 Race for Governor) has forgotten my name.

That's what I'm counting on at least.
I don't know why, though. My basic personality comes out in these posts. I think I'm still keeping my name secret to protect my ex-girlfriend's dignity...

It's my paranoia coming out, perhaps, but I don't want any mutual friends of ours who haven't seen us in a while to come across my blog and read about us.

Everyone thought she was a quiet, sweet girl who would never do her boyfriend wrong. She also came across as strong willed...someone who would never let another person take advantage of her.
But, she implied that I had taken advantage of her.
And, since I have already written about that here, I don't want it coming back on her...any of it.
I'm still trying to be fair to her. I always will.

That's the Angel sitting on my right shoulder.
You folks know the rest.

Guess who's sitting on the left shoulder...

This Space for Rent mkII!
November 6^th, 2003
12:53 A. M.

Ok, so you have read (those of you who aren't too angry after finding out I have no rental property available to read any farther) that I have been reading other people's web logs. In some of these logs, I've noticed a comments section available at the end of the posts.

I must confess, I've been jealous of these people and their neat little comments option. I imagine it must be easier for them to interact with their readers than it has been for me. I mean, that 'send me an e-mail' stuff doesn't work for me.

You may have trouble believing this, but since I started this log back in August (2003), I haven't gotten any e-mail comments at all! Terrible isn't it?
And, I know it can't be because folks aren't reading...I mean, I have a site meter, and I get traffic tracking reports at least twice a month from that to the 'contact me' address. According to those reports, some weeks I can have as many as 100 page views!

Again, though...I have to wonder how many of those page views are from people looking for apartments or storage space or, inexplicably, pictures of nudity in gym locker rooms and showers.

I bet you folks would be too frustrated to leave a comment. Or, if you did, it's probably not one I would want to read.

Well, today will be the first day my comments will be available. If my guess is correct, you should be able to comment on any post you so desire...I had no idea that this option would be retro-active! I thought it would be available for every post after today. Perhaps not!

It's Wednesday, Time for the Only (Mostly) Regular Feature
November 5^th, 2003
11:34 A. M.

Humpday Quote of the

Week!

A diamond cannot be polished without friction, nor the man perfected without trials.
-----Chinese Proverb

The Polls Are Closed, and the Results Are In
November 4^th, 2003
11:50 P. M.

The Republican candidate won the governorship of Kentucky today. I will admit...the Democratic incumbent has had some serious explaining to do about a few too many things. An extramarital affair with the director of a retirement home (or whatever the places are called these days) comes to mind.
Ho-hum, I know...a man in a position of power having an affair? Duh.
But, the perplexing thing for me is that this Democratic governor has been, well, lax, when dealing with environmental problems stemming from the coal industry. I thought Democrats were supposed to be environmentalists...
And, equally perplexing, is the move he made on the issue of black lung disease....He decreased eliminated workers' compensation payments for people who became ill from this disease.
Of course, that benefited a big industry
...We called him a Democrat?
Hmm.

When I went in to vote, I hate to admit, I felt as if I was completely uninformed about the candidates. Who do they have business dealings with? How have they handled the offices (if any) they have held in the past? The only information I could go on are the radio and TV spots that have been running for the past several months.
Based on those ads, I wouldn't be able to make up my mind on who to vote for even if I didn't fall back on the party affiliation stuff.

Well, that's what I get for not informing myself!

Talk at work today turned, of course, to politics. I told a friend of mine that I briefly considered a write in campaign for governor, but I nixed the idea because I had not even so much as a running mate. Well, folks, now I do have a running mate, and we will be putting together a campaign staff.
And, remember! We will all be Frankfort outsiders (unless someone on my campaign happens to be from Frankfort, but they will be from outside the power structure)!
More news will follow!

And, now for those who asked me today, here's a directory of American political parties. Informative...and weird at times.

Off to the Polls Tomorrow
November 3^rd, 2003
11:38 P. M.

Yes...It is election time here in Kentucky. Wonderful.
We get our public discourse, like every other state in this union, reduced to sound bites and one-liners. I bet the founders of this country are terribly proud of us right now.
I've heard people from both parties claiming they will be able to "clean up the mess in Frankfort."
I can think of no other way to say it than this; the only way to clean up that kind of mess is to bulldoze the place and rebuild. But, aside from that, I would agree that it is time to clean up the current mess there...if only to make a brand new one in a matter of a few weeks.

One thing I've noticed...a lot of other people have, too...that people running in these political races seem to think that a clever marketing campaign is all it takes to get into office. Unfortunately, they're right.
Let's face it. If a politician actually tries to be elaborate, tries to take the time to spell out what he or she means when they say "the mess in (insert capital city here)," they get buried. Same on any issue at all.
And the thing that really bugs me about this particular race is that these folks advertising themselves as able to clean up messes aren't really saying what the messes are, or what they have in mind to do in order to clean it up!
Listen, I work 40 hours a week. I know many, many of you out there work a lot more than that. Factor in all your other obligations, and it may appear that you don't have time to listen to the details of anything at all.
But, you know what...this is the future of our state here. Next year, it's the future of our country. In the midst of all my running around, I would like to say right here and now, to whomever might be reading, that I would find the time to educate myself on whatever issue there is to learn!
Candidates, present and future, hear me now! Hearing you all accuse each other of "negative, false attack ads" is not helping me decide to vote for whom (and in many cases to vote against whom)!

And hearing all this about how political "outsiders" are most likely to win offices, I must say it is damn tempting to run for some sort of office myself.

You can't get much more "outside" than me.
I have no experience whatsoever at holding a public office.
Heck, write me in tomorrow, and I promise to hire a team of writers to come up with some fantastic one liners that people of all political stripes can enjoy!
I can't promise you the best sound bites you've ever heard, but I promise you that when I get my writers together (many...nay!...all of whom will come from outside the profession of writing), that we shall give it all we have!

I must disqualify myself right now, though. I do not even have a campaign team together. Therefore, I would be also hard pressed to through together a transition team before I took office early next year. But, I will go ahead and through my hat in the ring for the next cycle! Remember me then!

Anyone interested in joining my campaign, please feel free to contact me!

Yer Hanar, Ah Was Sober Enough t'Know Ah Was Droonk
November 2^nd, 2003
11:47 P. M.

I went down to the authentic Irish pub again tonight. It was Irish music night tonight, and I have managed to get my mother interested in going there to hear it. She met me down there at 5 P. M. this afternoon, and she left at around 6:30. I just got home.
While I was there, she bought me two ciders and a Kahlua and Creme. After a cider and a half, I felt a change coming over me. Pitiful, isn't it? Two ciders, and I have a nice little "head change."
Well, after she left, I spotted a friend of mine from my old apartment complex. I went over to sit with him, and he introduced me to a friend of his.
Tonight happened to be trivia night, and we formed a team...whose name I absolutely loved. They had the name "Hippie Mafia" picked out. Nice little divergent thing...the name of some of the most peaceful people combined with the name of the most violent people on Earth. Great name.
We came in fourth place tonight, but that's not the point of this post.
I am inebriated. And, I don't get this way very often.
At all.
The first alcoholic drink I ever had was with my mom. The second was with my dad. And the time between my first and second drinks was more than six months. So, tonight I have had about 4 years worth of alcohol, on my old average.
Two ciders...
One Kahlua and Creme
Two Bud Lights
One more cider
And another Bud Light.
Sad thing is that all this was spaced over 6 hours.
Another sad thing is...I can tell you that I don't need alcohol to come across as...well...drunk.
Think of what a drunk person is supposed to be and you have me while I'm sober. Minus the slurring of speech and loss of motor coordination (mostly...I am clumsy for the most part, anyway).

I must say, I am starting to understand why friends of mine were entering this state while they were still in High School. It's fun, if you don't take it too far. But, unlike the rest of them, I was in no hurry whatsoever to experience my first drunken episode (nor my first hangover, which, thankfully, I have yet to experience).
Well, that's all for tonight. Suffice it to say that I don't think I made a bigger ass of myself than I would have if I hadn't had anything to drink.

That's the nice thing about not giving a flying...umm...flip...about what people think about you....

Diddled By My Spell Checker, Again
November 1^st, 2003
9:20 P. M.

I noticed, after D pointed out, that I dated Thursday's post as October 39^th. She seemed to think that I did it on purpose to be funny.
And I did!

You can skip this next part, D.

Ok, some sad truth here. I didn't do it on purpose. I'm not clever enough to do something that funny on purpose. But, don't tell D that. And I hope she's skipped over this part to the next one.

It took me quite a while to think of a funny way to open my Thursday post. I figure after having a not so great week (financially, at least) I could think of a way of brightening someone's day, and I thought;

"Hey! What if instead of the 30^th, I call today the 39^th!"

It took me all day Wednesday to come up with that. I think maybe if I hire a couple of other writers to This Space for Rent, I will be able to have more time to think of other things (as if I really want to think about anything else going on, or rather, not going on in my life.)

* ** * *** * ** * ***

I've been listening to a lot of Warren Zevon for the better part of the past 18 months (long before I knew he had terminal cancer.)
There was something I wanted to put in my Thursday post which, for some reason, I forgot to include.
I wrote about D's problems, and how I felt about them. I meant to close that section with a quote, but instead, I managed to write about myself. I feel like such a selfish fool for that...as I have every right to feel.
But, here is what I wanted to close with last night...here's hoping, once again that I don't offend anyone in Mr. Zevon's estate, or violate copyright law in any way (seeing as This Space for Rent is not a money making venture for me, and I am hoping that for every one of my favorite artists I post about, that someone reading goes out and buys a copy of that artist's work, I may not have any problems quoting a song every once in a while).
So, here it is, an excerpt from;

Don't Let Us Get Sick
Warren Zevon, Zevon Music BMI
The sky was on fire
When I walked to the mill
To take up the slack in the line
I thought of my friends
And the troubles they've had
To keep me from thinking of mine

That is from the album "Life'll Kill Ya". I've tried looking for it all over Lexington, Ky, but it has proven difficult. I've had to check it out of the public library downtown in order to get my fix of it. It's such a wonderful album...no wonder I was on a two month waiting list to get my hands on it!.

* ** * *** * ** * ***

Ok, so back to the subject of this post, "Diddled By My Spell Checker Again." D, I'm truly sorry for lying to you earlier...I didn't call it the 39^th on purpose. I told you that so you would think I was clever.
I wasn't.
I just found another one of those mistakes that spellchecker isn't going to detect. If there are any such mistakes to be made, I'll make'm.
But, when I misspell something on purpose, it gets caught.