Ziiiiiiiiinnnggg!!

This is from one of my "It Really, Really Happened!" files.

So, let me set the scene.

Four years ago, I worked at a wastewater treatment plant. I could go into details here, but I've been out of that line of work for long enough that I'm starting to lose my appetite when I think about where I worked. But, suffice it to say, part of my ... ermm ... Duties ... Involved cleaning machinery.

The building I worked out of had absolutely no storage space. It was mostly open spaces, with a truck bay (the ... mmm ... Dump truck ... Was parked under two large funnels and three pipes that delivered ... *shudder* ......)

Anyway, since I couldn't store my supplies or equipment in my building, they had to be stored about a quarter of a mile away in the Maintenance building. I was always getting down there (arriving by golf cart, which was FUN during the winter ... Mmmm! Donuts!) as the maintenance guys were having their meeting.

Up into my mid twenties, I was very much a morning person. That draggy period which the morning crankies wore off has pretty much always been short for me. And, I was the kind of little perky-jerk that could get on peoples' nerves (if they are of the proper mindset, at least. People usually ignored me until they woke up.)

One day I was walking through their morning meeting, doing my normal routine. This particular morning, the boss was assigning jobs for his crew to do for the rest of the day. One guy got an assignment he normally didn't get (these men, for the record, are licensed mechanics, so anything other than preventative maintenance and/or repair is not something they usually expect.)

The dialogue, right as I was walking by;
Boss: JIM!
Jim: [Who had looked nearly asleep in his chair a moment before. Sitting bolt upright now] WHAT?
Boss: [as David Aaron crosses the scene]I need you to hose out the tanks today.
Jim: [as David Aaron approaches within inches of him] Tanks?
David Aaron: [Leaning in toward Jim, placing a hand on his shoulder] Yar Velcome! [Walks immediately away to gather cleaning supplies]
Jim: [After blinking and a three-beat pause. As David Aaron crosses quickly out of the scene with a bucket of supplies in his grip:] Man, it is too early in the morning for that shi...!